Weekend Movie Wrap-Up

1. Jackass 2: $28.1 million
2. Jet Li's Fearless: $10.6 million
3. Gridiron Gang: $9.7 million
4. Flyboys: $6 million
5. Everyone's Hero: $4.75 million
6. The Black Dahlia: $4.4 million
7. All The King's Men: $3.8 million
8. The Covenant: $3.3 million
9. The Illusionist: $3.275 million
10. Little Miss Sunshine: $2.875 million

Bruce Willis is a Democrat and he wants you to know.

After years of being called a "Hollywood Republican" Bruce Willis wants everyone to know that he is a staunch liberal and even though he agrees with the war.

Confusion over the movie hardman's politics was sparked when he reportedly backed the war in Iraq, and even made an appearance with US President GEORGE W BUSH at the White House.

But now he's keen to be seen as a staunch Democrat, according to the New York Daily News.

He says, "I'm always being accused of being a Hollywood Republican - but I'm not! "I have just as many Democratic ideas as Republican ones. If they could build three fewer bombs every month and give the money to foster care, that would be great."

And afterwards Bruce proceeded to beat the hell out of the interviewer and hound him with a disposable camera while yelling, "LEAVE ME ALONE!" Just shut up Bruce, now I like you even less. I thought you wanted privacy and shit, why do you keep telling all your most private shit, daymn son. O shit, I bet Bruce is gonna kick my ass now.

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What's the deal with Africa?

So Madge wants to go all Angelina Jolie now, and start adopting little African babies from Malawi. She at first only wanted to adopt one of them, but is now planning on bringing the siblings into her ultra-chic lifestyle.

A source said: "Originally Madonna and Guy planned to adopt only one child. But when they were told that might mean breaking up a family unit they immediately said they would take siblings or twins if that was the right thing to do.

"They want the children to be as young as possible but are prepared to take kids up to the age of four. And they are also willing to consider a child with special needs arising from being abandoned in an orphanage."

Her spokeswhore has confirmed she will travel to Africa next month for six-weeks, but didn't confirm whether or not she was picking up some kids.

Please Madonna, doesn't even know what grade her little ho daughter is in, why is she buying more children? Just because it is all hip to buy destitute children doesn't mean you have to do it to Madonna, you don't need African children to make yourself feel important, she must be another one of those celebrities that is all guilty about their success yet they don't give it up, like Brangelina.

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Fatass Brandon Davis got straight-up punched!

So Fat Elvis Brandon Davis proved that even if your daddy's a billionaire you can still get your dumbass punched. So abunch of super-hip and cool people were partying at Paris' STD-lair, when the sea donkey Davis got the good idea to start walking around and calling everyone a "loser" or "whore" but in a loving way. When he approached Nicky Hilton's bf, Kevin Connelly with the same loving regards, he wasn't having any of it. At first he just open-hand slapped him like the bitch he is, and then when Fat Elvis wouldn't stop he straight up punched the mofo twice, in front of shitloads of super famous people.

I'm sure all Brandon Davis could do was yell out stupid insults and call him a firecrotch or something, because he is a big fat baby. I guess this was all right before Lindsay Hohan crashed the party of her nemesis Paris, and I'm sure hilarity ensued, or drug use, or a sex tape or whatever, who even cares.

Jessica Simpson to open a chain restaurant?!

Skank-face Jessica Simpson is to open a Hooter's-esque chain restaurant in hopes to keep her name afloat in the press. In the continuing bastardization of the Dukes of Hazzard franchise, Jessica will be opening a restaurant called "Daisy Dukes" where abunch of girls serve in the famous daisy duke shorts from the show.

This new business plan was of course thought up by her weirdo dad, who I'm sure just wants to see Jessica in daisy dukes daily. I'm sure he was oogling his daughter one afternoon, with his hand on her thigh, and said,"We should have girls like you serve food in little hot pants, all the time darling." And she just answered, "Hyuck, sure Daddy."

Apparently, Joe is going to make a shitload of money off of this, but in his eyes it's a two-fer, staring at young girls in hot pants and making money for it, wooo!

For all you, who actually care and would go here, it will be opening in Caesar's Palace early next year, hopefully it burns down with Jessica inside, no offense, haha.

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Grey's Anatomy beats boring ass CSI with flying colors.

One of my favorite shows, Grey's Anatomy, beat out one of my least-favorite shows, CSI, in the ratings with a giant margin of difference! Grey's Anatomy scored 25.4 million viewers the CSI's meager 22.6 million viewers, when they were pitted against each other. Not only that but, Grey's beat CSI in all of the important demo's, and everyone finally realized only old losers watch CSI.

It is even funnier because all these insiders thought that CSI would still trounce Grey's Anatomy. Maybe all the old people that watch CBS are finally starting to die off, I bet they weren't expecting that.

By the way Grey should choose Finn over her damn McDreamy, put him in his place, but whatever.

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Sienna Miller may be going Oscar.

So mega-producer Harvey Weinstein is out on a mission... to get Sienna Miller up for an Oscar after her performance in Factory-Girl. Of course if there is one role this bitch can play it is definitely one of a jilted, bitter, and screwed over lover, because I mean hey look at her.

This bitch ain't nothin special, she has small boobs and looks like one of those smelly coke-whores that never showers. Who wants that, except other smelly uglies like Judy Law?

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Downey Jr. supports ol' Mel Gibson.... uuuh what?

So Robert Downey Jr. has come out to say that he is in full support of Mel Gibson and his recovery, and realizes that nobody is perfect. He apparently feels a strong sense of loyalty because the mega-star Mel helped him overcome his many, many bad habits.

He has been condemned by a number of celebrities, but Downey Jr says, "He's an artist and he's imperfect like the rest of us. I don't know if I could ever be there for him as much as he has for me. I've talked to him and seen him. He's doing great, he's a good dude and he's taking care of himself."

Dude, nodody is imperfect like Downey Jr, who else is found with speedballs and transvestites on a regular basis? And how terrible is it that Robert Downey Jr. feels sorry for you? I mean really think about that for a minute, to this man a DUI is just another Saturday evening. Whatever, at least Mel Gibson has one person backing him up now.

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Happy Birthday Bitches!

Kevin Sorbo (48)
Nia Vardalos (44)
Megan Ward (37)
Rafael Palmeiro (42)

Penelope Cruz has an emotional attachment to her fake ass.

So in Penelope Cruz's new movie "Volver" she has some fake ass on to enhance her short-comings and she says she doesn't like taking it off after shooting for the day.

"I couldn't leave the set. I didn't want to take my false ass off. There was an emotional attachment. I was a disaster for two months. I was unbearable," she told reporters at the Toronto International Film Festival on Friday, shortly before the Spanish movie had its gala North American premiere.

Almodovar said he wanted Cruz to wear that "false ass" -- one of the more famous props of recent cinema -- to make her character, Raimunda, resemble an Italian film heroine of the 1950s.

Dude, where the hell is her false face, because I have never thought this bitch was even slightly attractive. It always looks like she has been sucking on a lemon and that she is going to yell out abunch of Spanglish obscenities. Penny Cruz is such a mess altogether, people should stop giving her jobs, and she should stop being the official beard of Hollywood.

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Ewwww, Liza Minelli has herpes and David Gest wants $10 million.

The alleged man, David Gest, otherwise known as Liza's little bitch claims that Liza unknowingly gave him herpes, is known for violence, and is a complete drunk. I guess I am surprised by the herpes, sort of, but I mean what was Gest expecting from this mess?

Gest's lawyers told State Supreme Court Judge Harold B. Beeler Friday that Minnelli hid the fact that she was infected with herpes, was an alcoholic and prone to violence. Had Gest known, the lawyers argued, he never would have entered into the prenuptial agreement.

Minnelli's lawyer, Israel Rubin, refused to comment on specific allegations. "This whole thing is ridiculous," he said. Gest's lawyers asked Beeler to order a trial to determine the validity of the prenuptial agreement.

I never knew exactly how crazy this ho is, but daaaaayyymm! Apparently she has just been passed around NYC and doesn't remember any of it. So I guess, word to the wise, don't fuck Liza Minelli. But did I really need to tell anybody that? Ewwwwwww. Damn, and if I were that freak David Gest I would totally want a shit load of cash too, that herpes shit is with you for life, I would want to kill that ho.

Pirates Of the Caribbean 2, the 3rd movie to gross $1 Billion!

The Second installment of the POTC series has just become the first movie ever to gross $1 billion in ticket sales. After dominating the summer ticket sales across the globe, this movie has now reached Titanic level.

Disney confirmed that, by the weekend, the second in the swashbuckler series had sold $1.003 billion US gross.

However, Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest has already beaten another record by taking in $135.6 million US at North American theatres on its opening weekend. It beat a record held by Spider-Man (2002).

A third film, Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End, is already shooting in Los Angeles with principal cast members Johnny Depp, Keira Knightley and Orlando Bloom.

This shit is crazy, I can't believe that you can turn any old Disneyland ride into a billion dollar movie. You know Disney is scrambling to put together the Big Thunder Mountain and Matterhorn movies any day now, and who would be able to blame them, every little brat in the country would want to see these too.
All that being said, I love these movies and I will see everyone, but I am a hypocrite, so whatever.

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Anna Nicole Smith's grown son dies at 20!

Only two days after Anna Nicole Smith had a new baby girl, her older son Daniel died in the Bahamas.

A statement from Howard K. Stern, Anna Nicole Smith's attorney, did not provide any details of Daniel Smith's death, and he declined to comment when contacted by Reuters.

"We have yet to learn the cause of death but do not believe that drugs or alcohol were a factor," Stern said in the statement. "Anna Nicole is absolutely devastated by the loss of her son. He was her pride and joy and an amazing human being."

How sad, I though everything was starting to go on the right track for this mess, Anna Nicole. You know trimspa ain't gonna be doin' shit now, she is going to blow right back up. Anna is going to sink into a whole of pills, alcohol, and fried chicken....sad

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Happy Birthday Bitches!

Ludacris (29)
Brian DePalma (66)
Harry Connick Jr. (39)
Moby (41)
Virginia Madsen (43)